Wednesday, August 18, 2010
I'm sorry for being a blog slacker lately. I can't remember if I announced that I started going through The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron a couple weeks ago. Oh boy is it doing a number on me.
Week 1: Was all about facing the fire. I started doing the daily pages and it seemed like everything I wrote was a question about what I was thinking, why I was thinking it, what I had and hadn't done and why, etc. I was rapid firing questions at myself and the questions were not kind or light-hearted in nature. No. I am a tough interrogator, that's for sure. Needless to say, I made myself a little miserable through all the self-torture.
Week 2: Was all about restoring some sanity. I started noticing little glimpses of hope among the ick I had created for myself. I began to notice tiny little opportunities. I began to see some of the self-defeating thoughts approach the door, reach their mean little fists up, preparing to knock and then I caught them in mid motion and scared them away. Booga booga! Shew! Little buggers. It was amazing actually, I noticed that I started showing up to take care of me. Little things started happening in my life with what feels like very little effort on my part. Coincidence? Serendipity? Attraction? Synchronicity? Whatever you want to call it, it started happening and it is glorious.
Week 3: Is all about restoring some power. I'm working on just allowing time to work everything out how it is meant to work out. The seasons change, people age, climate fluctuates all without any input from me. Do you think there's a chance that my life will continue to progress if I just allow the universe to do what it's there to do and stop getting in its way? Um...yes please. My huge lesson which feels like an anvil lifted off my shoulders is that "time will tell and heal all". Time is an illusion. It's a man made creation and carries only the meaning that we've defined for it. The truth is that everything will come to pass with or without that definition. So, my choice is to allow everything the time and room it needs to generate the energy intended. My strangling it to death pushing an imaginary deadline that I've created for myself is NOT helping anything. I give up and that feels like a runner's high or a walker's delight or a cyclist's buzz or a swimmer's peace. FREE!
Have you learned any big lessons about yourself lately?
What have you done to actively live your life in the past couple weeks?